Seventh Son
Reviews
Frank Ochieng
The mundane medieval movie ‘Seventh Son’ is indicative of the cinema wasteland that the beginning of a brand new movie season trudges in after the New Year arrives. In any event, ‘Seventh Son’ is in good company (or is that bad company?) with flaccid fare such as the sci-fi eyesore ‘Jupiter Ascending’ and the meatless melodrama ‘The Boy Next Door’ joining the parade of putrid pictures occupying the big screen at the same time. What is even more shockingly shoddy about ‘Seventh Son’s embarrassing presentation as a sluggish supernatural movie misstep is the inclusion of Oscar-winner Jeff Bridges (‘Crazy Heart’) and current Oscar-nominee Julianne Moore (for 2014’s ‘Still Alice’) saddled in director Sergei Bodrov’s (‘Mongol) period piece sci-fi sludge. Bridges’s gray-haired evil-bashing spook and Moore’s wicked witch may very well deserve to have their SAG cards revoked upon audiences sitting through this faceless fantasy of hocus-pocus. ‘Seventh Son’ wastes no time in setting up its familiar, generic premise involving a mentor-trainee tandem in the wise and haggard spook Gregory (Bridges) and his youthful farmboy protege Thomas Ward (Ben Barnes), an apprentice learning the ropes in taming the evil-doers that dare to exist and persist. Get this…old Gregory is considered a laughingstock (in addition to appearing as a leading personality in this ludicrous narrative) for believing in the evil-minded forces that he warns about consistently. Well, Gregory’s warnings are not so humorous to the naysayers when the sinister witch Mother Malkin (Moore) makes her hostile presence known. Resembling ‘Maleficent’s gaudy twin sister in wardrobe, Mother Malkin escapes her confines to concentrate on two treacherous tasks at hand: seek revenge on the meddling geezer Gregory and, of course, to control the world under her devilish grasp. The sorcery sass Malkin means business and the desperate Gregory must contain her with the recruitment of the chosen Thomas. Naturally, Thomas comes with a unique yet confusing mythology attached to his backstory which explains Gregory’s undivided attention towards the young sword-wielding raw talent. It is revealed that the revered young-blood Thomas is the ‘seventh son’ from a lineage of seventh sons in his lineage. Thus, Thomas has the specialized aura to carry his own weight into battle as he will serve as an adequate fighting tool for Gregory and the cause to restore order for a doomed society not ready to deal with cutthroat Queen of Mean in Mother Malkin. So we witness Thomas’ so-called training methods and the philosophical mantras that go along with his journey in the name of good versus evil. What would a stud-in-combat-mode be without a lovely lady as an incentive to complete his heroic sacrifices? In this case, Thomas develops a romance with his object of affection in half-witch Alice (Alicia Vikander) who may have some hidden relationship secrets of her own that may prove critical. Bodrov’s wooden direction and screenwriters Charles Leavitt (‘Blood Diamonds’) and Steven Knight (‘Easter Promises’) present an amateurish and spotty script that does no favours at all for the rancid ‘Seventh Son’. Drowsy dialogue, disjointed storylines, hammy acting, tedious fight sequences, derivative-looking 3-D special effect flourishes, cornball sorcery ans swords swagger, spaced-out and unintentional amusing dragons and other convoluted creatures are all are on delusional display in this faulty fable that feels strung together in the aftermath of a drunken stupor originating at the local pub. In this demonic dud, both Bridges (whose ‘Seventh’ role recalls the forgettable flop ‘R.I.P.D.’) and Moore are outrageously cast in this clumsy costumed drama and one has to wonder why these veteran performers would sign on the dotted line to appear in this medieval mess? Barnes follows suit as the touted apprentice but his Luke Skywalker-lite antics in ‘Seventh Son’ are dismissed almost instantly. Even the pronounced presence of Oscar-nominee Djimon Hounsou (‘Blood Diamonds’, ‘Gladiator’, ‘In America’) cannot give any animated muscle as he appears as Radu, a multiple blade-armed, sword-swinging warlock with stylish jazzy chain accessories. Only the supporting roles of Vikander’s bewitching beauty Alice and Olivia Williams’s Mam Ward (Thomas’ mother) come out of this vacuous venture looking mildly memorable and inviting. ‘Seventh Son’ is based upon the Joseph Delaney books with a decent following in literary circles. The big screen adaptation of Delaney’s pages is meager to say the least. Clearly, there will be no heralded ‘Twilight’ trend beneath ‘Seventh Son’s cinematic wings and, if this statement is proven wrong, then perhaps those very same wings need a serious clipping. Seventh Son (2015) Universal Pictures 2 hrs. Starring: Jeff Bridges, Julianne Moore, Ben Barnes, Djimon Hounsou, Alicia Vikander and Olivia Williams Directed by: Sergei Bodrov Genre: Science Fiction and Fantasy/Medieval Melodrama/Supernatural Fable/Sorcery and Swords Saga Critic’s rating: * star (out of 4 stars)
Per Gunnar Jonsson
This is a good, solid fantasy adventure. It is not a “wow great” kind of movie but definitely enjoyable to watch, at least if you are a fan of fantasy, magic, dragons and such like. The movie is based on a book which I have not read although I believe it is considered as a young adult book. The movie seems to reflect this in that it has a fairly simple, straightforward, adventure plot. This is a movie made to entertain with magic, adventure, a bit of humor and visual effects. Nothing more and nothing less. In my opinion it does so fairly well. I do like Jeff Bridges in his role as a rather wacky hunter of evil witches who have fallen into a dark and uncaring attitude towards the world around him. Uncaring about everything except slaying of witches that is. Ben Barnes, portraying the apprentice and Seventh Son is unfortunately making a rather bland impression. Then Julianne Moore is definitely better as the evil witch. No movie where fantasy, magic and dragons are among the main themes can be without special effects. So, not surprisingly, there are a fair amount of them in this movie. I think they are generally well made and complements the story well without being overdone. On the whole I liked the movie. It is a simple but solid adventure story with just the right amount of a few humorous remarks, nice visual effects, a bit of romance and action.
Movie Recommendation
Jupiter Ascending2015-02-04In a universe where human genetic material is the most precious commodity, an impoverished young Earth woman becomes the key to strategic maneuvers and internal strife within a powerful dynasty…More...
Son2021-03-18When a young boy contracts a mysterious illness, his mother must decide how far she will go to protect him from terrifying forces in her past.More...
Exodus: Gods and Kings2014-12-03The defiant leader Moses rises up against the Egyptian Pharaoh Ramses, setting 400,000 slaves on a monumental journey of escape from Egypt and its terrifying cycle of deadly plagues.More...
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies2014-12-10Following Smaug's attack on Laketown, Bilbo and the dwarves try to defend Erebor's mountain of treasure from others who claim it: the men of the ruined Laketown and the elves of Mirkwood. Meanwhile an army of Orcs led by Azog the Defiler is marching on Erebor, fueled by the rise of the dark lord Sauron. Dwarves, elves and men must unite, and the hope for Middle-Earth falls into Bilbo's hands.More...
Finding ʻOhana2021-01-29Two Brooklyn siblings' summer in a rural Oahu town takes an exciting turn when a journal pointing to long-lost treasure sets them on an adventure, leading them to reconnect with their Hawaiian heritage.More...
Hot Tub Time Machine 22015-02-20After their first adventure with the Hot Tub Time Machine, Lou and Nick are living very well off their ill-gotten gains, while Jacob still cannot rely on Lou to be a positive role model. When an unknown assailant breaks into Lou's mansion and shoots him, Nick and Jacob take him for another trip in the hot tub. They emerge in the year 2025, where they must figure out who shot Lou and prevent it from happening again.More...
The Breaker Upperers2018-03-10Two women run a business breaking up couples for cash but when one develops a conscience their friendship unravels.More...
In the Name of the King 2: Two Worlds2011-11-03Granger, an ex-Special Forces soldier gets thrown back to medieval times to fulfill an ancient prophecy. Venturing through the now war torn Kingdom of Ehb, he teams up with an unlikely band of allies with the goal of slaying the leader of the "Dark Ones". Fighting against all odds, they must free the land from the grasp of the evil tyrant Raven and save the world.More...
LEGO Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Out2012-09-26Luke Skywalker embarks on a mission to destroy an Imperial base, but is relentlessly chased by a group of fanatic girls who think of him as a celebrity. Meanwhile, Darth Vader engages a rivalry with Darth Maul, in order to prove that he's the best Sith Lord.More...
Korengal2014-05-30Korengal picks up where Restrepo left off; the same men, the same valley, the same commanders, but a very different look at the experience of war.More...
Mary2017-06-05Marinko, an assistant worker in the tow-away service has had visions of Virgin Mary. He does not know what to do with her.More...
The Summit2017-08-17At a summit for Latin American presidents in Chile where the region's geopolitical strategies and alliances are in discussion, Argentine president Hernán Blanco endures political and family drama that will force him to face his own demons.More...
14 Blades2010-02-04Commander Qinglong is the loyal leader of the assassin group that serves the emperor. But when his allies plan a rebellion against the ruler, he finds himself in danger.More...
The Jungle Book1994-12-23Raised by wild animals since childhood, Mowgli is drawn away from the jungle by the beautiful Kitty. But Mowgli must eventually face corrupt Capt. Boone, who wants both Kitty's hand and the treasures of Monkey City – a place only Mowgli can find.More...
Snow White2001-10-28Snow White's mother dies during childbirth, leaving baby Snow and father John for dead on an icy field, who then receives a visit from one of Satan's representatives, granting him three wishes.More...
Welcome to Me2015-05-01A year in the life of Alice Klieg, a woman with Borderline personality disorder who wins the Mega Millions lottery, quits her meds and buys her own talk show.More...
Royal Palace2005-11-23Eugenia is the queen of an imaginary European country. When her husband dies, quite unexpectedly, the country is left without a king. According to the law, the new king needs to be married so that leaves out the eldest son. Her youngest son, Prince Arnaud is married to the lovely Armelle and they have two young children. They become the future rulers of the kingdom.More...
Mythica: A Quest for Heroes2014-12-08Stuck in a life of indentured servitude, Marek dreams of becoming a wizard. When she meets the beautiful priestess Teela in need of help, she offers her assistance and provides a motley troupe. Together they go in search of Teela's sister, who was kidnapped by a wild ogre.More...
Guernica2016-04-26The fates of Henry - an American correspondent - and Teresa, one of the Republic's censors during the Spanish Civil War.More...
Black Coal, Thin Ice2014-06-11Two former cops start investigating the series of murders that tanked their careers when the killings begin again.More...
Similar Movies
The Cowboys
1972-01-13When his cattlemen abandon him for the gold fields, rancher Wil Andersen is forced to take on a collection of young boys as his cowboys in order to get his herd to market in time to avoid financial disaster. The boys learn to do a man's job under Andersen's tutelage, however, neither he nor the boys know that a gang of cattle thieves is stalking them.Fire in the Sky
1993-03-12After clearing brush for the government, a group of men return to town claiming their friend was abducted. Despite no apparent motive or evidence of foul play, no-one believes their story and his disappearance is treated as murder.Sabrina the Teenage W...
1996-04-07A girl, sent by her parents to live with her two eccentric aunts, finds out on her sixteenth birthday that she is a witch.High in the Clouds
2027-07-07After he accidentally sparked a revolution against Gretsch, the bossy diva-owl who has banned all music from his town, a teenage squirrel named Wirral embarks on an extraordinary journey to set music free.The Snow Walker
2003-09-11A bush pilot in nothern Canada who with the aid of modernity thinks he can handle it all & knows it all. After reluctantly agreeing to transport a local indian girl to a medical facility his light plane crashes & they have to survive whilst finding their way back to civilization. Along the journey the man finds a new respect for the native ways as they battle to survive the elements.Ugetsu
1953-03-26In 16th century Japan, peasants Genjuro and Tobei sell their earthenware pots to a group of soldiers in a nearby village, in defiance of a local sage's warning against seeking to profit from warfare. Genjuro's pursuit of both riches and the mysterious Lady Wakasa, as well as Tobei's desire to become a samurai, run the risk of destroying both themselves and their wives, Miyagi and Ohama.The Emperor's New Clo...
1961-05-28The adaptation of Hans Cristian Andersen's tale filmed on a white background. It is also the first Croatian movie in color.Endurance: The Story ...
2015-11-21When Ernest Shackleton is given the ship Endurance to reclaim the record for the furthest south expedition, his journey is cut short when his ship becomes trapped in the ice pack and begins to sink.Luna
2014-09-26Renowned artist and filmmaker Dave McKean (MirrorMask) brings his distinctive blend of live action and gorgeously wrought animation to this dreamlike reverie about four people whose weekend idyll in an isolated English seaside home becomes an opportunity for spiritual healing.Turma da Mônica Jovem...
2024-01-18On the first day of high school, friends Mônica, Cebola, Magali, Cascão and Milena don't take long to realize that things at school have been strange. When they discover that the Lemon Tree Museum will be auctioned, they decide to join in a mission to try to save it. As they investigate, they come across ancient and frightening secrets of the Limoeiro neighborhood and soon realize they may be dealing with a much bigger threat.FX's A Christmas Caro...
2019-12-19London, 1843. Ebenezer Scrooge, a bitter old man, despises the Christmas holiday. Over the course of Christmas Eve night he is visited by three ghosts to show him his past, present and future.Ella Enchanted
2004-04-09Ella lives in a magical world in which each child, at the moment of their birth, is given a virtuous "gift" from a fairy godmother. Ella's so-called gift, however, is obedience. This birthright proves itself to be quite the curse once Ella finds herself in the hands of several unscrupulous characters whom she quite literally cannot disobey. Determined to gain control of her life and decisions, Ella sets off on a journey to find her fairy godmother who she hopes will lift the curse. The path, however, isn't easy -- Ella must outwit a slew of unpleasant obstacles including ogres, giants, wicked stepsisters, elves and Prince Charmont's evil uncle, who wants to take over the crown and rule the kingdom.The Princess and the ...
2002-08-16"A truly noble heart is sensitive," says the wise old raven, Sebastian, who pokes, prods and analyzes peas seeking the solution that would save the kingdom of Corazion from the revenge of Laird, the king's brother. As Sebastian seeks to solve the mystery, his friend, Prince Rollo, is searching for a truly sensitive heart in the pedigrees of pampered princesses, until a chance encounter with a kind-hearted peasant girl causes Rollo to ponder where true beauty lies. Can Sebastian discover the answer in time to rescue the kingdom from the cruel schemes of Laird? Join in the quest to reveal the heart of true nobility.Creation of the Gods ...
2023-07-15Based on the most well-known classical fantasy novel of China, Fengshenyanyi, the trilogy is a magnificent eastern high fantasy epic that recreates the prolonged mythical wars between humans, immortals and monsters, which happened more than three thousand years ago.The Fight for Rome II...
1969-02-21The devious general Cethegus plays the Byzantine and Gothic forces against each other for his own gain.Fate/stay night: Heav...
2017-10-14Ten years after the Fourth Holy Grail War, a devastating clash between Masters and Servants, another war erupts. Shirou Emiya, whose father fought in the first battle, was leading a peaceful life with the warmhearted Sakura Matou. But when hidden forces begin to stir, Shirou resolves to fulfill his father’s dying wish, protect Sakura, and fight for the Holy Grail.Vampire Buster
1989-06-08In ancient China, a demon was defeated in a fierce battle with a priest, who sealed it's evil spirit in a vase. Centuries later, during the cultural revolution, rebels attempted to gain possession of the vessel from the priest's descendant; however, he threw it into the ocean to keep it from being tampered. The vase was recovered years later in Hong Kong and was auctioned off to a councilman. The demon, unfortunately, escaped and took control of the councilman's body, beginning a spree of terror in the city.My Dear Kuttichathan
1984-08-24The story revolves around a mystical indigenous goblin called "Kuttichathan" who is under the spell of an evil sorcerer; however, it gets released by three children and then befriends them.Doctor Strange
2016-10-25After his career is destroyed, a brilliant but arrogant surgeon gets a new lease on life when a sorcerer takes him under her wing and trains him to defend the world against evil.Rei Rei
1993-01-01Mankind's problems are tempting the moon to move away from the planet Earth, but Kaguya, a superhuman spiritualist, is attempting not to let it go off too far. She comes down to Earth from her home in outer space to help solve the relationship problems of people. Her first assignment involves foiling a perfect murder and a bit of gender-bending as she tries to help Tanaka revive the life of his dream lover and get revenge on the killer, which was her ex-girlfriend. The second assignment involves pulling a sexually frustrated teenager's spirit out of a video game after the stress of being dumped forced it outside the body.